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CAT-worker - what jobs would cats do if they had to work?

Sometimes the myKotty team wonders how would our world look like if cats ruled it and we come to the conclusion our furs would live in a completely different universe. In their world, snacks would grow from the ground just like grass, birds would be obligated to be at the bird feeder 24/7 to work as cat TV and there would be no mention of any work whatsoever - there’s no time for that in between naps. However, on our Facebook profile, we did ask you, dear fabCats, about the possible jobs cats could do if they had to work and your answers blew our minds. So today on the blog we’ll be creating the job profile of a CAT-worker. What would they be doing in life? 

CATrdon Ramsay - jobs for cats in the food industry 

Kitchen is obviously one of the places you mentioned most often as one having the potential to employ cats. There’s so much good going on there! Fresh meat, sounds of cutting on the cutting board, new smells, snacks falling from the sky - a cat wouldn’t even have to work hard to jump up on the worktop since a certain way of looking at the hoomans would do the trick. 


What food industry jobs you predicted for your cats? Among the most popular answers, you said:  

  • food tester - of all sorts, since you should taste everything at least once in your lifetime; 
  • butter taster - besides the taste value of it all, butter is good for removing hairballs!;  
  • baker - they have it good. Get up in the morning and fall right back asleep on a warm oven top, combining work with your passion for naps;  
  • cold meats tester - the taste tester role here is limited to the best cuts and, thinking like a cat would, we’re not surprised you went here :)  
  • food critic (with the word of the day being “Don’t like it”) - even cats have to have their Gordon Ramsay to keep the kitchen working well;  
  • culinary inspector - degustation is one, but someone’s got to supervise the cleanliness; 
  • alcohol tester - we must say, it’s not a popular idea, but when your cat always looks like they’ve been to a party, we definitely wonder what they were drinking and how much catnip was there; 
  • butcher - nothing more to say here. The freshest of meats available only at the local butchers’. 

Computer expert - can cats revolutionize IT? 

Cats have proven more than once that their knowledge when it comes to computers is not limited to sleeping on the keyboard and showing their rear end to the camera on a company online meeting. Who of you, fabCats, had to figure out how to “undo the magic changes your cat made in a document with a secret shortcut”? We can definitely raise all our paws up here :) 


Who would cats be besides a keyboard shortcuts expert according to fabCats who had fun with us and Monday questions on Facebook? Some of your ideas included: an IT guy, a programmer, a text editor, a copywriter and a poet. We’re curious to know how many computer mice would suffer from companies giving away their IT care into cats’ paws.  

Cat special forces

Among the fabCat cats, there are some real macho, feline daredevils, experienced detectives, inspectors and those who would take their careers into less legal territories.  When asked about the jobs your cats would do if they had to work, you answered, dear fabCats, that your felines would become: building inspectors, volunteer water rescue service, security workers, meatheads guarding the entrance to a bar or even rangers and stuntmen! We must admit, your cats don’t lack courage, for sure.  


And what if we used cats’ intelligence, curiosity, inquisitiveness and their ability to sneak in special operations? Your furs have a future as detectives, spies and special agents, but some of you see them also on the other side of the law. Burglars, gangsters, thieves, hitmen … we wonder who, besides flies, would have the courage to expose themselves to a hunting cat. 

Voice acting, maybe? 

They say cats can make over 100 different sounds and seeing your answers in the comments on Facebook, we’re eager to believe it. You see your cats as sports commentators, tenors at the opera, but also managers who are always shouting or… local activists who will get everything done, should everything there is to be shouted out and won’t be easily defeated. Keep it up, fabCats! 

Jobs made for cats

Your fabCat jobs idea bag wouldn’t be complete without those which no other species could do as perfectly as cats do. Cats have many talents under their fur and if we were to use their potential to the fullest, cats could definitely work as: 


  • a duster or a mop - not very hygienic, but it’s hard to deny that cats are the ones who will get everywhere, find every piece of dust around the house and even a white glove test can’t beat them.  
  • A manager for passive-static workouts that cause a complete relaxation. We don’t know if you feel the same, but for us it sounds like a very official, respected and well-paid job only for purrfessionals.  
  • a tester for sleeping spots/armchairs/sofas/beds - can you imagine someone better for the job? In our eyes, cats are unbeatable here. 
  • Warehouse worker/cardboard tester. If there’s a cat, there’s a box, so the role of warehouse worker was necessary to make it onto the list. But can you do any work if every box needs to be tested for its napping qualities? The speed of shipping out orders could get seriously harmed :) 

If you want to drop in your ideas, dear fabCats, the comments await - there are as many ideas for cat jobs as there are cats and we’re sure your furry friends have many dream jobs in mind. P.S. Make sure to check out our Facebook profile on Mondays  - https://www.facebook.com/myKottypl/, where you will find more fabCat dilemmas and unusual questions it’s worth thinking about.  


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